female, orgasm, symptomsThere seems to be a variety of physical signs many females conform to when they achieve orgasms. Those would include things like erection of nipples, muscle tensing up and the like. Is there a list of those physicals signs that most women exhibit when they climax, and if so, which ones could be “opted-out” with enough practice (for example, can a woman achieve an orgasm without tensing up)?
The tl;dr version: every woman is different. If you have / could have access to multiple partners or female friends who aren't particularly shy, feel free to ask them what their reactions constitute. Otherwise, this is something that you and your partner should communicate about, as it will lead to a more positive experience for both of you long term.
As you mentioned, there are a lot of potential responses in women to indicate an orgasm. There are also a number of factors that can affect the visibility and "obviousness" of these responses as well. I'll do my best to be thorough.
The most common response (that is also difficult to "fake," if that's what you're asking) is the flexing and the extension of the pelvic floor muscles. Women who regularly perform Kegel exercises will have longer and more intense orgasms, and their Kegel muscles will flex more rapidly and with more strength. Duration of an orgasm is affected by how much foreplay over what kind of time, as well:
Q: My orgasms seem too short. Is there a way to make them last longer?
A: According to our experts, yes. Try doing some trusty Kegels, those pelvic-floor exercises that work the muscles that control your urine flow. “A few times a day, do both long holds for 10 to 20 seconds and short rhythmic squeezes—as many as you can to give your orgasm more comic-book pow!” say Miller and Solot. A longer buildup to climax can help make yours last longer too. “Rather than rushing from zero to 60,” say Miller and Solot, “get yourself close, then back off a bit. You can repeat this 10 times if you have the patience! By building up the tension, you earn yourself a bigger release.”
(Above from Glamour Magazine.)
The flexing of pelvic floor muscles is probably the most universal reaction. Partners can feel this either, if they are male, around the shaft of the penis or around fingers during manual stimulation.
Since an orgasm results in the release of oxytocin and prolactin, a lot of women will sigh deeply following an orgasm, and their entire bodies will relax fully. Many women experience hypersensitivity in the refractory period following an orgasm, which is a common response to overstimulation. Basically, this feels like every nerve ending is tingling, all over one's body. In this period, stimluating the clitoris is actually actively uncomfortable, however maintaining firm pressure on the clitoris can extend the orgasm further and prepare the body for a next iteration. If she does maintain a hypersensitivity period, running a hand along legs, her torso, across and under (eg. where the wire of her bra would run) her breasts, inside forearms (especially if she spends lots of time at a keyboard!) and at the juncture of her neck and collarbone will be stimulating without being overwhelming.
A number of women will have a number of muscles tense or spasm in the buildup to an orgasm. Most common are legs bending at the knees (some women will do this to help angle their partner further into the vagina) or toes curling. Depending on how aroused and how intense the oncoming orgasm is, her back may arch as well. This may be combined with a full body shudder or undulation, the latter of which will basically be her back arching and continuing into her rolling her hips.
Other have mentioned other fairly common physical reactions, including but not limited to:
However, a number of these indicate arousal as much as orgasm. Furthermore, depending on the amount of exertion that she has engaged in during intercourse, as well as if she's having multiple orgasms, these could be signs of strenouous physical activity. A full, complete list of female phyiscal response during orgasm is meticulously documented in Chapter 15: Physiology of Sexual Response and Orgasm of Alfred Kinsey's Sexual Behavior in the Human Female.
Notably, women who are relaxed about engaging in sexual intercourse are most likely to experience orgasm:
Many women believe they should have an orgasm—or better yet, several—every time they have sex. But if you're too busy chasing or counting them, you'll miss out on all of the pleasurable sensations in between. I had one patient who'd never had an orgasm and had spent years trying. But when she learned to relax and just enjoy the sensations she did experience, guess what happened? She climaxed.
(From Glamour Magazine.)
Furthermore, while the clitoris is a cluster of nerve endings, the most concentrated "knot" of nerves is located slightly above and to the left of the clitoris itself. To use a metaphor, if one were to overlay a clock centered on the clitoris, this "knot" is located roughly between 10 o'clock and 11 o'clock. Stimulation of this during foreplay and/or intercourse can yield a stronger reaction in the female partner.
Also, because the clitoris is a cluster of nerves, other avenues can be used to prolong, stimulate, intensify, or extend an orgasm. Many women like the feeling of pressure on her mons along with clitoral stimulation, as the nerve runs up through the mons.
Questions about how vocal a female partner will be about. This, as with everything else, is entirely dependent on the partner herself. Some women react very vocally and, ah, with gusto. However, most women are quieter, either due to socialization (many cultures impose an ideal of women being quiet and submissive in all aspects) or just by nature. (I'd like to point out that the same variation occurs in men; some are louder throughout the experience, some quieter but communicative physically, etc.) Generally speaking, the release of oxytocin and prolactin will yield a very deep sigh or groan accompanied by a total body relaxtion, almost to the point of her turning into a deadweight. (And, if your partner is loud, perhaps consider taking advantage of it.)
Ultimately, if you aren't sure if your partner is having an orgasm, suggest she masturbate in front of you. This will offer multiple benefits:
Of course, offer to masturbate for your female partner, as well, especially if she's less experienced or a newer partner.
Finally, as a point of interest, the Guardian reported recently that the female orgasm had been captured in a series of brain scans.
Increased blood flow and muscles tensing up is basically the most sure signs of orgasm in both male and female, the muscle tension does not need to come until seconds right before the climax. Increased blood flow on chest, neck and face is probably the most obvious signs depending on complexion.
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